SHE is almost unrecognisable – but Adele believes she has finally found her true self.
The superstar singer says her transformation is down to a self-help book by US author Glennon Doyle – who left her husband for a female soccer star.
Adele, 32, urged her 38.5million Instagram followers to follow Doyle’s teachings and raved of her book Untamed: “It’s as if I just flew into my body for the very first time. This book will shake your brain and make your soul scream.”
Fans of the self-help guide include telly chat queen Oprah Winfrey and Hollywood actress Reese Witherspoon.
The book – part memoir, part manifesto – will be adapted for TV by Star Wars director JJ Abrams’ production company.
Untamed tells how Doyle, 44, fell in love with US Olympic football champ Abby Wambach.
She learned that Craig Melton, her husband and the father of her three children, had cheated on her with several women.
And Wambach, 40, who is her country’s all-time leading goalscorer, had been arrested for drunk-driving and later admitted to being hooked on prescription drugs.
Doyle was known for her religious blogging but realised she had to be with Wambach – who was also married – and they tied the knot in 2017.
Now Doyle is telling readers: “What the world needs is masses of women who are entirely out of control.”
Adele seems to have taken that on board, imploring her followers: “Anyone who has any kind of capacity to truly let go and give into yourself with any kind of desire to hold on for dear life, do it. Read it. Live it.”
Here are Doyle’s crucial steps to an Untamed life.
ASK yourself what you want rather than what the world wants from you: The author outwardly appeared to be a great success, having published two bestselling books before Untamed.
But her marriage was in trouble and she was struggling with the stress of combining motherhood with a career and raising money for good causes.
She writes: “Being bad had almost killed me but so had being good.” Now her mantra is: “We don’t have to be good, we can be free.”
Feel it all: Doyle recounts how she used to numb negative feelings with alcohol and drugs.
Now she says to accept bad emotions alongside the positive. She says: “I keep a note stuck to my mirror: Feel it all.”
Be still and know: Brought up in a Catholic household, Doyle says she is no longer sure she is a Christian but does follow Jesus’ teachings.
She doesn’t want to put a name on her connections to God and believes in an internal wisdom, “the knowing”.
It is important people pause and take time to listen to their “knowing”.
Dare to imagine: At the age of 26 Doyle fell pregnant with her first child. She couldn’t see herself as a mum due to nights of heavy drinking. But she loves being a parent.
When she met Abby Wambach, she worried this wasn’t the right person to fall in love with. But when she imagined their future life together, it seemed right.
Build and burn: The author says to let each family member enjoy their “right to their full humanity” rather than following traditional structures.
Aged 11, Doyle was treated for bulimia and she says we should reject old-fashioned ideas about girls being pretty and gentle. She writes about not constraining her two daughters and one son with gender norms.
Be courageous about yourself: Doyle writes: “We tell our children being brave is being afraid and doing it anyway. But is this the definition we want them to carry as they grow older?
“‘Brave’ does not mean feeling afraid and doing it anyway. To be brave is to forsake all others to be true to yourself.”
Self-love: The self-described “introvert” confesses to not being good at friendship because she forgets birthdays and won’t reply to every text.
Now her focus is on herself and her own desires. Doyle writes: “Self-love means that I have a relationship with myself built on trust and loyalty.
“I’ll abandon everyone else’s expectations of me before I’ll abandon myself.”
Take notes: Doyle, who suffers from depression and takes antidepressants, recommends people take notes about their emotions — both when they are feeling down and when they are happy.
That way, if a patient has perked up when their doctor’s appointment takes place, they can show a true record of their sadness.
It also means that when they are depressed, they can reach for a note about a happier moment.
Look into your eyes: When she had to decide whether to continue in her unhappy marriage for the sake of her children, Doyle took a good look at herself in the mirror.
She decided abandoning her true self would be worse for her children than staying in that rocky relationship.
Doyle writes: “You need to look into your eyes — at your real self. You need to make sure there are no lies there.”
Allow your children to fail: Doyle is against the constant supervision of so-called helicopter parenting, arguing that we shouldn’t be too protective of our children.
She says she tried to shield her kids from life’s problems before concluding they would ultimately be better off working things out for themselves.
The author writes: “People who do not suck are people who have failed, dusted themselves off and tried again.”
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