How to maintain your dignity during a heat wave: LAURA WINDSOR, the Etiquette Queen, tells what not to wear, gardening equipment to stay away from, and drinking guidelines

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With temperatures reaching 34.5C, it’s the hottest May day on record in Britain, and it’s predicted to get even hotter on the warmest Bank Holiday ever.

However, there are other, more systemic issues to be mindful of this season rather than just worrying about whether you’re wearing enough sunscreen.

Fortunately, the Queen of Etiquette, Laura Windsor, has shared the dos and don’ts of heatwaves in her comprehensive guide to summer politeness.

Men can wear shorts in the city, but only if they are fitted, according to the expert who gave Netflix advice on Regency-era social graces for Bridgerton. For example, wearing a bikini in a park is strictly forbidden.

And if you want to appreciate your neighborhood park but don’t have a garden? Laura said, “Don’t set up tents, a BBQ, and ten coolers.”

Continue reading for the etiquette expert’s summertime behavior guidelines.

The Queen of Etiquette, Laura Windsor, has shared the dos and don’ts of heatwaves in her comprehensive handbook to summertime politeness (stock photo).

1. Never go to the park in a bikini; nobody wants to see so much skin while having a picnic.
2. Take a swim at the neighborhood pool; it will never look nice to install an inflatable replica in your garden.
3. A portable fan is stylish, but a Temu battery-operated gadget that irritates other passengers is not.
4. A gentleman will never grumble and will always wear a jacket, regardless of the weather. Making a fuss is terrible form.
5. A plastic bottle of water? A horrifying sight. It’s either lemonade or a cold glass or metal container.
6. Even during a heat wave, dress codes should be adhered to.
7. A summer dress should fit loosely without being overly baggy.
8. Unless you’re on a beach, stay away from mule-like footwear without a back strap.
9. Women are only permitted to wear hats until 6 p.m., after which they must be removed. They are only used for weddings and Ascot; they are never fascinators.
10. Always wear sunscreen since tan lines are the most unsightly thing, in addition to protecting your skin.
11. Don’t brag about your cutting-edge home air conditioning system to your pals. Keep it to yourself and enjoy the cool.
12. Make sure your dog is tightly restrained. It is totally inappropriate to ruin someone’s picnic because they couldn’t resist the Parma ham.
13. Men are permitted to wear shorts, but they must be fitted. “Short shorts” are only appropriate for swimming or sailing.
14. Avoid becoming a local DJ. Leave the speaker outside.
15. It should go without saying, but if in doubt, avoid staring at people who are sunbathing, whether they are men or women. Don’t destroy their fantasy of being on a Mediterranean paradise by giving them a sneer.
16. Enjoy the neighborhood park if you don’t have a garden, but don’t set up tents, a barbecue, a trestle table, and 10 coolers.
17. Avoid joining the crowds that swarm to the closest electrical store to spend hundreds of dollars on cooling equipment for the three days of the year that the UK experiences extreme heat.
18. Ensure that your feet are prepared for exposure, and if needed, treat yourself to a pedicure.
19. Always let your neighbor know when you’re grilling so they can do their laundry.
20. To be clear, unless your feet are in contact with the sandy beaches of the UK coast, you should always wear a top or shirt.
21. Keep in mind that everyone will have their windows open. Noisy do-it-yourself projects and early morning jet washing are not appropriate at this time.
22. Avoid discussing the heatwave. Don’t whine about the heatwave, please. Even if you have a stiff upper lip and are drenched in sweat.
23. Sticky fingers are disliked by all. Instead of ruining a Cornetto at work, enjoy an ice cream cone in the comfort of your own home.
24. Men, if you have to display flesh, make sure you have waxed your back.
25. When the sun is blazing, it can be stylish to shield your face with a parasol. Keep your face as youthful as you can because you only have one. It’s the greatest anti-aging product available. Overexposure-induced leathery skin at age 40 is not a desirable appearance.
26. Use deodorant (do you really need a reminder?). particularly when using public transportation.
27. Avoid using a lot of makeup that can cause your face to melt like wax.
28. It’s not cute to say “5pm somewhere.” Even on sunny days, avoid drinking before 2:00 pm.
29. Watch out for too-transparent linens.
30. Instead of 17 various pork dishes wrapped in pastry, picnics should consist of a few delicate sandwiches, fruit, and one or two savory snacks.
31. Your kids shouldn’t play with the outdoor hose after 8 p.m. and should still go to bed at their regular time.
32. Refrain from using body mist every 12 seconds when traveling by train.
33. If it takes more than an hour to go to the beach, don’t go; that’s just desperation.
34. Building a bar in your backyard is never appropriate. If you have to, get a cocktail shaker.
35. Since they will only be used once, don’t hurry to B&Q to get elaborate garden seats like egg chairs and sun loungers.
36. When someone asks you, “How was your bank holiday?”They don’t want to hear what you had for breakfast every day, so keep it succinct.
37. Wearing shell jewelry is not justified by the warmer temperature. All year long, that is tacky.
38. Greasy top knots are prohibited. Even in this weather, you still need to style your hair.
39. Invited to a picnic? It doesn’t look nice to arrive empty-handed, so always bring a food or drink offering to add to the host’s selection.

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