As he recounts new agricultural concerns, Jeremy Clarkson says he’s “wallowing in sorrow.”
When it comes to his farm, JEREMY CLARKSON admits he’s in a “bottomless pit of misery.”
Jeremy Clarkson, 61, has his hands full taking over a 1000-acre working farm, and even he admits he underestimated the number of challenges he would face. It was a significant challenge, which he met magnificently, but he described it as “a deep pit of pain and despair” in which he is currently “wallowing.”
In farming, there’s a bottomless pit of pain and despair, and I’m wallowing in it.
The Grand Tour host said in his new essay for The Times that all of his grumbling has finally made him feel like a farmer.
He said, “I can now whine for hours, without repeat or hesitation,” before going on to enumerate his pet peeves that have been bothering him for months.
“It’s the weather.” Defra. Carrie Johnson is a character in the film Carrie. That scumbag alpaca. Chris Packham is a British actor. Brexit. Badgers. Ramblers. The scarcity of wood.
“Flea beetles,” he continued. Black-grass. Sheep.
“Farming is a bottomless hole of sorrow and pain, and I’m wallowing in it.”
He also revealed his latest financial woes at Diddly Squat Farm, which have left him £700 in debt.
Jeremy said that they had been able to cultivate 50 acres before the moisture meter indicated that dew was on the way.
Despite the fact that the barley was only “just” dry enough to do so, it was still bad news.
“A whole lorry load was delivered to the grain merchant, who called the next day to say we hadn’t stopped in time, and that 1.2 tonnes of the 30 he’d picked up were practically water,” he wrote.
“Understandably, he stated that he would not be paying for it, thus the price was reduced by £170.
“And don’t forget, £170 is £26 more than the farm earned last year in total.”
But Jezza’s ordeal was far from over.
He moaned, “There was more too.”
“We’d be charged £256 since the 29 tonnes of actual barley we’d delivered him had to be dried before it could be transformed into hen chow.
“At least things got worse after that, because five of the tonnes we’d harvested wouldn’t fit in the lorry, and it wasn’t worth obtaining another truck for such a tiny amount, so it’s been sitting out in the open for a week, turning crusty and damp.”Brinkwire Summary News”.